Miscellaneous - Post Office Spitting Rules, 1900

PostMaster Norton's Rules, 1900

 

Since Postmaster Norton's appointment to the office he so acceptably fills, many improvements have been made by the Post Office department to facilitate the transaction of business, and every appointment of a modern and model office has been promptly supplied upon intimation from Mr Norton to the department that it was needed.  Thus it is that we have congratulated ourselves over both office and incumbent, with but a single minor detail neglected.  Even this has now been supplied by the reception Xmas morning of an express package, weighing 40 pounds from the P.O. Dept., at Washington directed to C.G. Norton, P.M., charges collect, 75cts, which Mr. Norton paid, the amount to be deducted from his monthly account as all packages from the Department should come charges prepaid.  "Do it now" is Mr. Norton's motto, so he immediately opened the box.  When the cover was removed the dozen interested friends gathered in the back room of the Post Office saw a neatly folded paper, beneath which was a large package surrounded by quantities of paper scraps.  When the package itself was uncovered there was exposed to the postmaster's astonishment gaze a gigantic spittoon painted and striped in many colors.  On the broad red top was painted in bold black letters, "Official Spit Box."  Within was a large envelope containing a type written document headed, U.S. Postal Service, Executive office, and reading as follows:

 

Regulations affecting Post Offices of the United States and Philippines.  By joint resolution of Congress introduced in the Senate by Platt of New York, and in the House by Bailey of Texas, it is provided:  Postmasters receiving more than five dollars per month salary are prohibited from spitting on the floor.

 

The first offence shall be punishable by a fine of fifty per cent of his salary, which fine shall go to the Deputy P.M., whose duty it shall be to report such offence.

 

The second offence shall be punishable by death and the third offence by election to Congress.  Proper Spit boxes shall be provided at the expense of the government to each and every post office except Lincoln, Neb. where the Postmaster and clerks shall be permitted to spit on their hands.

 

Article 6, Sec. 7, of the rules governing post office provides:  No Postmaster shall spit except as above provided unless he receive written permission from Aguinaldo [1st president of the Philippines], countersigned by the President.  Disobedience to this rule shall be punishable by a further increase in the Army. 

 

For the good of the country it is hoped Postmasters will spit according to regulations.

 

Singed Lilinokalani, By order of the Dept.

 

The Spit Box and regulations are now a part of the post office paraphernalia.  We congratulate the Postmaster upon the evident interest of the Department in his welfare.